Secret safe keeps your super secret valuables perfectly safe
Every time my cell phone rings, the same thought always comes to mind…
This is going to cost me money.
You see, everyone is on my bank roll. My daughter, my landlord, the IRS… even my neighbors want me to cough up a few thousand dollars to pay the vet bill for our community mascot cat who got into a bloody rough and tumble with a rabid raccoon.
I’m through paying you people off, so instead of hiding my money under the mattress (my daughter looks for it there), I’m hiding it in my beer can.
Yesiree Bob, this Beer Can Secret Safe from Self Defense Devices will ensure that I keep my fortune and continue living the Miller High Life.
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iPod toilet paper holder - Holds your iPod while you wipe
Let’s face it, dropping the kids off at the pool isn’t a very entertaining process. It can be boring, time consuming and at times painful… especially if you’ve had Indian or Mexican food for lunch.
Now you can add some pep to your potty time with this ingenious iPod Toilet Paper Holder from Opulent Items. Finally, we iPod enthusiasts can say goodbye to dropping our iPods in the toilet or running out of battery time during extended bathroom breaks… especially when we’ve had Indian or Mexican food for lunch.
I dare anyone to pooh pooh this incredible breakthrough.
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Switchblade combs are the coolest combs on the street
You gotta love the fifties.
The fabulous two tone cars with wings and lots of chrome, the chicks in poodle skirts, the open all night diners where roller skating cuties would deliver your meals on wheels. Those were the good old days, the Happy Days.
When I was a kid I wanted to be just like the Fonz or one of the Jets from West Side Story when I grew up. They could snap fingers to get girls, dance up a storm while still looking tough and their hair was always perfectly coiffed. If I weren’t sporting the shaved look these days, I would totally pick up this Switchblade Comb from Cruisin USA. It fits discreetly in your pocket and looks like a real switchblade knife. Whip it out whenever your hairdo isn’t cutting it…
just make sure there aren’t any cops around.
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Porcelain coffee cups for eco-friendly coffee drinking
I am NOT a paper cup. I repeat, I am NOT a paper cup.
I may look like a paper cup, act like a paper cup and hold coffee like a paper cup, but I am most certainly not a paper cup. Enough about what I am not… here is what I am.
- I am a porcelain coffee cup.
- I am white.
- I come with my own silicone lid.
- I am eco-friendly.
- I am dishwasher safe.
- I am microwave safe.
- I am 3.5 x 3.5 x 6 inches tall.
- I am from Modcloth.
I am saving the environment, one disposable coffee cup at a time.
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Custom beer glass for custom beer drinking
I completely missed the beer boat this Father’s Day.
When looking for the perfect masculine gift, it never really occurred to me to gift dear old Dad with personalized barware. An ideal gift for any man who has had his brewski swiped from right under his nose, this Custom Beer Glass from Personal Creations not only looks cool (like some awesome beer experiment you wish you could have worked on in physics class), but it can be personalized with up to 9 characters and can hold up to 32 ounces of ice cold beer.
Now we’re talking beer business.
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Digital HD Camcorders to digitally film your life in HD
My life is so grand, it deserves to be recorded in Hi-definition. For your consideration, I have comprised a Top 10 list of reasons why I am in love with my new Flip HD Digital Camcorder from CompuUSA.
1. It’s small and fits daintily in my purse
2. It has a nice wide screen
3. It has a brilliant Hi-Def picture
4. It’s simple to use, even for the electronically uninclined
5. I can hook it up to my computer easily
6. It has over 2 whole hours of recording time
7. It has super duper zooming technology
8. It can take stills
9. I haven’t broken it yet
10. I can film anytime, anyplace, anywhere…
In fact, I’m filming you right now.
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Transformers pinata transforms any birthday into an Optimus Prime affair
My birthday is the day after tomorrow and I’ve already secured all of the necessary party supplies:
- Birthday cake? Check.
- Wine and spirits? Check.
- IMAX movie tickets? Check.
- 3-D Glasses? Check.
- Personal appearance by Shia LeBeouf? Check.
- Transformers Pinata from Pinatas.com? Double check. (yep, I got two).
This Transformers Pinata celebrates the birthday girl or boy, while celebrating the new blockbuster release of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen 3-D. Every party needs a big whopping Pull String Pinata in the shape of Optimus Prime. He wages battles against evil forces and can be filled with delicious mini-Snickers bars. What more could a birthday girl ask for?
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Rock em Sock em Robots will rock your robot socks off
I’ve always had a fondness for games that allow me to beat other people up – Mortal Kombat, Virtual Fighter, Mike Tyson’s Punch Out… they always helped me feel triumphant and invincible, even though outside of the cyber fighting world I was completely powerless (my underdeveloped bicep is still recovering from being overthrown in an arm wrestling match against my brother two decades ago).
Aside from all of the lethal video games on the market, I always wanted a Rock em sock em Robots game for Christmas. Like little Ralphie Parker from A Christmas Story and his coveted Red Ryder BB gun, the object of my obsession was the original TKO classic that is now on sale at the Vermont Country Store. I still don’t know why I never got one. It’s not like I could’ve shot my eye out with it.
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Crazy pranks to pull on your crazy pranking friends
April Fool’s Day has come and gone, but I’ve realized over the years that you don’t need a designated day or reason to enjoy sweet revenge. On April Fool’s Day people are always on their toes, observant, ready and waiting. I like to prank people when they least expect it. Like when they’re in a stall in the office bathroom and I throw in a home-made stink bomb created with my Crazy Pranks Kit from Young Explorers.
*Hey, she deserved it. She never washes her hands, leaves toxic stink bombs of her own and is always messing with the settings on the coffee machine.
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Scented air fresheners, bacon scented for your pleasure
I like to speed.
I have a collection of speeding tickets on my driving record to prove it. I was busted for my last offense a few months ago when I was flagged down by a pudgy officer who bore a striking resemblance to the Booger Boy I knew in first grade who always offered me meatloaf from his cafeteria tray every Wednesday. I ended up in court with a reduced ticket fine thanks to Snotty, but still had to endure four hours I’ll never get back in traffic school. I don’t ever want to go to there again.
Lately I’ve been good, staying under 50mph for the most part, but yesterday a great song came on the radio and subconsciously I put the pedal to the metal. I was flying down the highway free as a bird, and then my senses scared me senseless. I smelled bacon. I slowed down (my heart beating faster than the crew of Harleys that were passing me) and checked the mirror. Not a copper in sight. Then I realized it wasn’t a police officer I smelled!
Silly Samara, it was only my new Bacon Scented Air Freshener from ModCloth.
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Funny wallet helps you keep all your dough
I am notorious for losing money.
I know, as a result of a crummy economic climate everyone is losing cash left and right, but my case is different. I can’t blame the economy, the stock market, Obama’s stimulus package or Bernie Madoff. I can only blame myself. I have lost five wallets full of cash in the past two years. In the ladies restroom at Bloomingdales, at a White Stripes concert, the teacups at The Magic Kingdom, the Fluff n’ Fold laundromat, and some creepy diner in Iowa.
I love cute wallets, but I can’t seem to hold onto one. The moment I realize it’s missing I run back to the scene of the crime only to find it gone without a trace. What I need is a wallet that’s incognito, a wallet that doesn’t scream out “take me, I’m fat with cash”. This Funny Wallet of Dough from ModCloth holds my dough while masquerading as a piece of real hot buttered toast. My bread is finally safe.
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USB Toy that makes my computer’s USB H-O-T
I have a dirty little secret.
I really dig computer time. Whether on my desktop at work or my laptop at home, I am completely and utterly addicted to my cyberlife. Lately I’ve been working, surfing and emailing all morning, noon and night with only a few breaks here and there to walk the dog. I don’t mind carpal tunnel syndrome, back strain, vision problems, muscle spasms or the imminent threat of arthritis. I’m addicted to my computer and it’s all this USB Toy Stripper’s fault.
She’s blonde, she’s sexy, and she dances whenever I turn her on (which is all the time, thank you very much). My pole dancing honey from Bud K Catalog is hooked up to my computer and keeps me thoroughly entertained with a wink, a smile and some killer badonkadonk. Even if I’m having trouble backing up my files, I just give her a dollar and she makes it happen.
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