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Top 10 Most Annoying Co-Worker Habits

By Editorial Staff

“I don’t want to buy your kid’s overpriced wrapping paper!! I don’t care if it IS a fundraiser!” That’s what you really want to say to that co-worker who’s always bugging you to buy her kid’s crap. Instead, you take the brochure, find the cheapest damn wrapping paper on it and ask her if you can pay later, to which she inevitably responds with a resounding “No. I need the money now.” This is just one scenario of many that play out over the course of a typical day in cubicle hell. Day in and day out you’re forced to co-mingle with the same people  — and their obnoxious habits. Here are the top 10 annoying habits of coworkers:

10. I’m going to be late … again”


Will Return Clock


He’s always late. He misses meetings. He leaves early. Yet he never gets called out on it. What is the deal with this guy? There’s always an excuse, too, like “It’s a snow day, gotta stay home with the kids!” or “Wow, my kid was really sick this morning, sorry I’m late and you had to do that presentation for me but I still get all the credit.” You know who I’m talking about. Tell him he needs this clock for his desk; at least his office mates will have an IDEA of when he might be around.



9. “OMG! We’re going to lose our jobs!”

Debbie Downer


Sometimes it’s fun to huddle with your work buddies and talk about (embellish) the bad stuff that’s happening at work, but constant negativity is a total pain in the A. Some people get off on it, though. The Debbie Downers and Negative Nancies of the office are a real drag after a while. Tell them to invest in a therapy light. It just might be the cure.



8. For sale!

School Fundraiser


Whether it’s the aforementioned wrapping paper, candy bars, cookie dough, M&Ms, whatever, she is always selling something for her kids. What happened to teaching good, old-fashioned salesmanship to your children? Send little Johnny door to door instead. The cubicle-dwellers of America are tired of being mooched upon! Next time she comes knocking, hand her one of these IOU vouchers and she’ll get the drift.



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7. “Wow, you reek!”

Cigarette


Why do you get stuck sitting next to the guy who smells like an ashtray? Or like he’s been in a bar all night and didn’t shower before coming to work. Everytime he gets up, you know he’s taking a smoke break … only to return and bring his stench with him. Next time he comes back from his break, tell him to pony up for this air purifier.



6. “I’ll do it! I’ll do it!”

Brown-noser Trophy


Everyone has one of these in their office – the brown-noser. She is always right behind the boss, taking on projects left and right, sucking up at every turn. It’s sickening. And why is it that the brown-noser is usually the person who does the least amount of work? This brown-noser trophy is the ideal gift for her. Make her think it’s from the boss and she’ll display it front and center, guaranteed.



5. “Can I borrow your can opener?”

Stinky Tuna


No! No! Not the tuna! Your cubicle mate goes out to lunch almost every day. But on the days she chooses to eat at her desk, she pops open a can of tuna or some other seafood product, ultimately clogging the air with that oh-so-sweet smell of fish stench that never goes away. Make her wear this T-shirt every time she eats tuna in the office. This way everyone will know who the culprit is.



4. Who turned up the volume??

Cellphone Booth


Every office has its loud mouth. The guy who blabs so loud on the phone that you’re privy to every single detail of his life, whether you care or not. There’s not a lot you can do to shut this guy up, so you’re forced to drown him out instead. Not anymore. Tell him to strap this portable cellphone booth to his back and keep his conversations to himself. It’s the perfect solution.



3. Click, tap, tap, click

Finger Drums


Maybe constantly clicking her pen eases her nervous habit, but it’s driving you to drink. All that clicking and tapping is like scraping fingernails on a chalkboard. Nervous habits are hard to break so if you can’t beat her, join her and give her these finger drums. At least she can make sweet music with all that fidgeting.



2. “Oh When the Saints …”

Annoying Cellphone


If you hear that loud, obnoxious ring tone one more time you might just throw his phone out the window. Cellphone ring tones are sooo over. Have the culprit take this ring tone test to confirm that he is indeed the office nuisance every time the theme song for “Sex in the City” blasts out loud and proud when his wife calls.



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1. “Oh no, it wasn’t me”

Pass the Buck Guy


The No. 1 annoying habit of an office coworker? Passing the buck. This guy takes the cake (and then blames someone else). Usually the buck-passer is also a suck-up, so it’s a double whammy. Avoid him if at all possible. He’ll just piss you off every time. But, just for kicks, leave this magic trick on his desk. At least it will make you feel better.

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