What to do when you forget someone's special day
Don't let a forgotten birthday or anniversary go by unacknowledged!Forgetting a friend or loved one’s special day, whether birthday, anniversary, or celebratory event (like a graduation or other milestone) can be embarrassing, not to mention a deep disappointment to the person on the other end!
But it doesn’t have to be a disaster. No one wants to be “that friend,” but it’s better to be the one who forgot but made up for it than the one who forgot and then avoided the injured party forever because she just couldn’t face the music. Here are several tips on how to make good on that date that just whooshed by. Remember, a date is just a day on the calendar. It’s the occasion that needs your acknowledgement, and there is always time for that.
Don't Put It Off Another Day
First thing’s first – make that phone call. Yes, the one you’ve been dreading because their birthday was yesterday and how is your sister ever going to let you live this down! But, trust me, the longer you wait, the harder it gets. When you do, cut right to the chase and apologize for missing the date immediately. Don’t make a laundry list of excuses. Just be short and earnest. You are sorry and you know there is no excuse for letting the date slip by, but you want to make it up to them. And then (this is important), tell them how you are going to do just that.
Say It with Me: Overnight Shipping
If your forgotten person lives too far away to arrange for a lunch date, send them something extra special – fast! Overnight shipping is your best friend here, so don’t overlook it. Send them a cake that absolutely takes their breath away. A specialty bakery will not only bake a cake, but design a masterpiece that helps you make up for even the most egregious of missed occasions.
A flower bouquet or some other special gift that you know will brighten their day are alternative ideas. When you call your loved one to apologize for your oversight, you don’t have to say what you’re sending, but do mention they should be expecting a package from you. It will give them something exciting to look forward to, and can go a long way toward soothing hurt feelings.
You might also need to check with them to see when they will be home to receive the gift, in case it is something that shouldn’t be left on the porch.
Make It a Date!
One of the best ways to make up for a missed occasion is to set a date to spend some one on one time with your special person.
Invite a coworker out for drinks for a belated birthday or post-employment-anniversary; make reservations somewhere fancy (that you know she will love – extra points if it is somewhere sentimental to the both of you) to make it up to your wife that you completely spaced your wedding anniversary – and plan dessert stargazing on a blanket or a special art viewing or play for after; plan a weekend trip to the zoo or aquarium with your favorite niece or nephew to celebrate their first communion (which you knew about for weeks and then got called in to work when the day finally arrived).
There are all kinds of ways to spend meaningful time with a person to celebrate and talk about their recently passed special date. Like with any kind of gift-giving, think about who you are spending time with and make it special to them.
Whatever you do, when you find you’ve missed an important date, don’t ignore it. Deal with the mistake immediately, and you might find your belated gesture means more to them than that of everyone who acknowledged their special day as a matter of course. At the very least, you’ve made it memorable.