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Top 10 Ways to Waste Time

Written by: Editorial Staff

April 7, 2011
Filed Under Offbeat 


A list of the top ten ways to waste timeContributed by Robert P. Simon, Top 10 Guru

You could be cleaning your apartment. Or studying for a test. Or heading to the gym. But you’re not.

It’s the weekend, and the truth is, all you’re interested in is sleeping till noon and then finding enough ways to keep yourself occupied till you’re ready to hit the town. Here are a few ways to kill time.

My top ten ways to waste time:

10. Surfing the internet

Top ten ways to waste time

An old standby, the internet is always good for a few hours of fun. Bored? That’s cool, because thanks to the internet, you can watch a squirrel surf, read esoteric music reviews, or study the intricacies of the burgeoning secondary market for pink beanie babies in the Malaysian subcontinent.

9. Over-walking the dog

One of the top ten ways to waste time

Usually a necessity, dog walks provide an excellent excuse to put off that nagging kitchen chore. After all, Ranger needs the exercise!

8. Walking the cat

One of the top ten ways to waste time

For those who either don’t have a dog, or who do have a dog that’s already hiding under the kitchen table to avoid another hour-long walk around the block.

7. College football

One of the top ten ways to waste time

A perfect way to kill a lazy fall afternoon, college football starts early on Saturday morning, and it doesn’t stop till you’re passed out with a Hot Pocket on your stuffed belly. Women love it because they get to root for their favorite school and giggle at the shirtless frat boys, and men love it because, well, it’s football.

6. Take a nap

One of the top ten ways to waste time

Time flies when you’re having fun, or when you’re asleep. If you couldn’t find the former, might as well go with the latter.

5. Hang out at the coffee shop

One of the top ten ways to waste time

A great location to enjoy a tasty drink, people watch, read a book, or pretend you’re cool, the coffee shop is an excellent place to waste an afternoon under the auspices of actually doing something important.

4. Gossip media

One of the top ten ways to waste time

Although most of us hate to admit, we all love to live vicariously through our celebrities. Unnecessary support, schandenfreude, envy… Gossip magazines satisfy all our baser needs. What are Brad an Angelina up to? Which Teen Mom’s baby daddy is in jail now? Did Benicio Del Toro really get locked in the port-a-potty shooting his latest movie? Who knows, but it’s all more important than whatever chore your significant other wanted you to get done this afternoon!

3. Shop for clothes

One of the top ten ways to waste time

Doubly counter-productive, shopping for new clothes burns time and money! What better way to waste an afternoon than with a little bit of shopping therapy?

2. Go to the bar

One of the top ten ways to waste time

Well, if you weren’t going to get anything else done, you might as well head out and enjoy a few drinks. You’ll make friends, have a good time, and you might just incapacitate yourself well enough to cover tomorrow afternoon too!

1. Facebook

One of the top ten ways to waste time

An intricate web of friends, acquaintances, friends of friends, acquaintances of friends, and acquaintances of acquaintances, Facebook satisfies the inner voyeur in all of us. There’s no easier way to burn three hours than to secretly shuffle through photo albums of your ex-girlfriend’s cousin’s best friend’s wedding, after all.


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