If you think you’ve used some cheesy pick up lines before, check these out.
It was Tuesday afternoon and I was in Home Depot staring at the two-inch paintbrushes just minding my own business. As I was trying to decide between synthetic or natural bristles, someone spoke next to me. I don’t know my phone number, the voice said. I looked to my side to see a man about 40 years older and 12 inches shorter than I. Feeling true concern he might be experiencing some sort of senior moment, I politely asked him, What happened sir? He repeated himself, I can’t find my phone number. Then he shrugged, smiled and with expert form asked, Can I have yours?
I laughed, which was a big mistake, and told him he was bad. That’s all he needed to hear and next he was following me around showing off his laminated army pictures from the Korean War. But it was my fault for acknowledging one of the cheesiest of the cheesy pickup lines that guys use on us not-so-unsuspecting women.
The Lure of the Pickup Line
According to one of my bachelor friends who I consider an authority on this topic, men use cheesy pickup lines on women because it’s like fishing. They throw their lines out there and see which of their cheesy lures succeed in getting a conversation started. Because there’s always a possibility for success, they will continue using cheesy openers until the end of time.
Guys or gals will even use the cheesiest ones hoping to get a laugh out of the object of their desires. My friend says women expect to be entertained when a guy approaches them, so pickup lines are a vital part of the dating game. And men are not the only ones to throw out these lures, as women use cheesy pickup lines too.
If you want to add more cheese to your dating life, here are some that may or may not work. I’ve categorized them into degrees of cheesiness. Grab the crackers!
Colby-Jack Cheesy Pick Up Lines (a little bland and overused)
- Did the sun just come out or did you smile at me?
- I seem to have lost my telephone number, may I borrow yours?
- Do you come here often?
- Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?
- Your legs must be tired because you’ve been running through my mind all day.
- Bond. James Bond.
- Do you know karate, because your body is kickin’.
- If you were a burger at McDonalds, you’d be named McGorgeous.
- If you’re here, who’s running heaven?
- What do you do for a living?
Swiss Cheesy Pick Up Lines (a little tangy but mostly full of holes)
- Could you please step away from the bar? You’re melting all the ice.
- You’re more beautiful than a hundred pink flamingos on a golf course.
- You’re so hot; a firefighter couldn’t put you out.
- If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
- If I make you dinner, will you make me breakfast?
- Baby, you’re so sweet, you could put Hershey’s out of business. And speaking of Hershey’s, can I have a kiss?
- Hi, are you here to meet a nice guy, or will I do?
- Didn’t we go to different schools together?
Sharp Cheddar Cheesy Pick Up Lines (overly strong and a little pungent)
- Hey! Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche! (or Mercedes, Lexus, etc.)
- Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
- You must be named Jelly, because jam doesn’t shake like that.
- Are you Jamaican? Because Jamaican me crazy!
- If sexy was a crime, you’d be guilty as charged.
- Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.
- Do you have a Band-Aid? I just scraped my knee falling for you.
- Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only ten-I-see!
- I’m here, what are your other two wishes?
And, last but by no means least:
Excuse me, do you have a moment? I’d like to hit on you.
Of course, there are hundreds of cheesy pickup lines that are, shall we say, racy. They’re not included here. Whether you want a giggle or a slap is up to you. According to my expert the best way to approach a person in the dating scene is to be sincere about what you’re saying. Instead of using canned openers, just be yourself and use your own intelligence and wit.