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Top 10 Items for Your Golf Bag

Written by: Editorial Staff

July 26, 2010
Filed Under Sports 

Tags: , , , ,

Contributed by David Galassi, Info Guru

Experienced golfers know there are ten things that no golfer should golf without. These are the real basics: golf survival gear. Guerilla golf necessities.

Novice golfers will do well to study this list, memorize it and make certain not to leave for the course without these items. Note my apologies in advance; this list is definitely intended for guy golfers, from a guy golfer, who hangs with guy golfers.

Ladies, get your own list.

10. Writing implements

Not just any writing tool, like a regular old ballpoint pen. Specifically, you will need a black Sharpie marker and a wooden pencil. Along with marking your ball for identification purposes after your legend-making drive, a Sharpie works well for marking your scorecard on rainy days, acts as black shoe polish and lets you write your phone number on the beer girl’s cart. A wooden pencil is very important. It not only keeps tally of your strokes, but can be considered the best “wood” in your bag for a great score.

9. Extra socks

The obvious use is on a rainy day: you get some dry feet. Extra socks can also act as a spare golf towel and a club cleaner. When a golf ball is inserted — and with some practice – a spare sock makes a great “David and Goliath” slingshot to get your ball where you want it to go.

8. Someone else’s business card

When your errant shot breaks a car or house window, you take your Sharpie (see #10) and write a nice note about how you will pay the damage cost. You do this on the business card you found in the parking lot.

7. Bandaids

Of course when that thorn bush scratches you, you just might need a bandaid, and it’s darn annoying not to have one tucked away somewhere. But bandaids can also patch torn scorecards, fix a split grip, hide a scratch on your rented golf cart and cover the tattoo with your wife’s name on it when hitting on the beer girl.

6. Extra shoe laces

The obvious use for extra shoe laces is when you break a lace. You can also use your extra shoe laces to tie open the throttle governor on old gas golf carts to make them go 40 mph.

5. Binoculars

Other than wanting to see the pin placement on long par 5s, you can spy on the pool at the club house from the 10th tee or see your friends in the group ahead of you kicking their ball into the fairway.

4. Plastic garbage bag

Good to cover your golf clubs in a sudden downpour, along with filling it with ice and beer to make a watertight cart cooler. Heavy duty lawn-n-leaf bags are great. Green is the preferred color.

3. Tape measure

A tape measure takes all the arguments out of who is closest to the pin on those par 3s. It can also can be used to rescue a ball tucked way under that thorn bush and saves a bandaid (see #7).

2. Can opener

It can fix most anything that breaks, repair divots, clean grooves and can be used to defend yourself against an animal attack. (Or an irate golfer whose ball you picked up.) Alternate use … a can opener starts most electric golf carts without the key.

1. A scorecard from a different golf course

The golf course must be one far from your house. After two hours at the 19th hole bar drinking, you go home and toss the scorecard casually on the counter. Say the long drive home was filled with terrible traffic.

Actually you played a mile up the road at your local club. Don’t overuse this item, as it loses its power to charm after a long summer.


7 Responses to “Top 10 Items for Your Golf Bag”

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  2. Top 10 Items for Your Golf Bag « Colored Golf Ball Shop on July 26th, 2010 5:33 pm

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  3. Lee Blakley on July 26th, 2010 6:02 pm

    OMG!!!! So cute and so true!

  4. Mike on July 26th, 2010 6:26 pm

    This is the funniest thing I’ve read for awhile. What about the canned ham? That’s got to make the list – for distracting gators or making sandwiches for the guys when you’re caught behind the foursome with the combined handicap of 120.

  5. 4 steps to great putting on July 27th, 2010 6:52 pm

    [...] Top 10 Items for Your Golf Bag [...]

  6. Marko on May 22nd, 2011 8:24 pm

    Very well written!

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