Contributed by Rosemary O’Brien, Catalogs.com Top 10 Guru
Have you gone on many first dates?
If you have, you know it can be difficult to get the conversation going. Unless you have known the person a long time or spend a lot of non-date time together already, you may not know what your similar interests may be or whom you know in common.
Here are some ideas for the top ten first date conversation questions.
10. Where did you grow up?
If you live in a city, this is one of the more common questions to ask your date. As city dwellers, many people are transplants from other places. This is a good way to find out about your dates background. It is also a good way to find out how they ended up living where they do. If you are dating in or near your hometown, this may lead to an entire conversation about who you both know, a great place to find common ground.
9. What do you do for a living?
Unless you met this person at work, this is one of those first date conversation questions that can tell you a lot about the person you are seated across from. It gives you an idea of what they enjoy doing, or at least what they spend time doing, with at least forty hours of their week.
8. Do you enjoy your job?
Some people just work without thinking about the enjoyment, especially in the downturn in the economy when jobs are scarce. By asking, “What do you like about your job?”, you can get a sense of his or her passions and interests. By phrasing it in a positive way, you avoid a lengthy rant on what they hate about it.
7. What college or high school did you go to?
The answer to this question can tell you a lot about this person’s future dreams and goals. If he asks, “Why go to college?”, then he may be defensive about not having the option due to family or other circumstances. If he tells you about his experiences, either in high school or college, with enthusiasm, you may dredge up good memories of a fun time in his life and end up talking about all of the fun things you may have both experienced in school.
6. Do you know this person or that person?
If you both went to the same college or grew up in the same town, the previous question can lead to talk of all of the friends you have in common. If you met at work, or even with friends in a club, you can talk about whom you know in common within those circles. Knowing about someone’s friendships gives you great insight into your date.
5. What hobbies do you have?
By asking first date conversation questions, you can perhaps find ideas for future dates if more dates are an option. Even something as simple and sedentary as reading can lead to an outing to the bookstore, a reading by a favorite author or even a film on a book you both enjoyed.
4. What do you like about those hobbies?
Finding out why someone loves something gives great insight into his or her personality. Maybe one of you knits and has never confessed that secret enjoyment to another person. Talking about something you both love can lead you both closer to finding out if this relationship is meant to be or lead to new hobby ideas for those dateless nights. Even if a romantic relationship does not work out, you may find a friend to share your hobby with in the future.
3. What do you think about …
– insert non-political, non-volatile news story of the day?
It is always advisable to limit first date conversation questions to topics that are not necessarily bland and colorless, but let’s just say less likely to cause an argument. Unless you both work together in a highly charged political campaign and you are certain your beliefs are completely the same, it is best to find the most innocuous topic of the news day to discuss. I’m thinking about something like a cat being found after getting lost on a trans-Atlantic flight or the famous starlet’s house that is finally for sale down the street.
2. What kinds of foods do you like?
Many people choose a restaurant when thinking about where to go on a date. If you are at a restaurant, food will definitely come up early in the date. You have to order something, right? Moreover, food tells a lot about a person. Tread lightly if you find yourself dining with someone who does not like anything on the menu, complains about how her face breaks out when she even looks at garlic, or puts you down for enjoying one food or another. All of these can be red flags to spending your time placating a picky person.
1. Do you like to cook?
Now, if someone cannot eat some foods due to bona fide allergies or dietary restrictions, ask them if they cook. Many people who have such food issues have learned to take care of themselves by cooking their own food. The best part of that is that they often enjoy cooking for others and that may mean you! Enjoying a nice meal in a comfortable setting such as someone’s home often brings out the real person.
First date conversation questions are actually pretty easy to come up with. If you are at a complete loss, talk about that! Talking about your lack of things to talk about may be the perfect icebreaker to a pleasant evening of conversation.